If you asked me if Viagra (or Cialis or any number of such pharmaceuticals) causes affairs, my answer is ‘no’. That doesn’t mean that no connections exists between them.
If you ask me what kind of relationship is there between viagra and affairs, I have some serious concerns. When a cheater is ‘ready to go’, the risk of an affair is higher.
When they don’t have their pills with them, the risks are less. Does that mean you need to monitor your spouse’s use of pharmaceuticals?
This is definitely something worth considering as part of your affair relapse prevention plan. It just takes courage in taking such action.
Keeping control of their pills sounds like a good idea. They may call them ‘medicine’ so that it sounds like something that they are supposed to take and always have with them.
Even with some birth control pills, the likely cheater uses such chemicals as their ‘safety net’.
These chemical safety nets have found ways of bypassing God’s natural checks and balances on affairs. The fear or pregnancy and the risk of impaired arousal due to guilt have been reduced by such chemicals.
Cheaters now have ways of getting around some of the natural consequences of their actions. It’s not surprising that the sexual revolution occurred shortly after birth control became available on a wide scale basis.
There’s also the secondary issues coming with the use of chemical bypasses. The cheater gains added self-confidence.
When caution and self-doubt were present, the choice to cheat was not so quickly made. Besides the direct effects of the chemicals, there’s the secondary effect of the increased self-confidence.
It’s as if the chemicals were a ‘protection policy’ to them. Even the adds for birth control devices/chemicals include disclaimers about the chemicals do not protect them from sexually transmitted diseases.
It seems that with the chemicals, the cheaters feel like superman or superwoman and assume they are impervious to STD’s, pregnancy and guilt-inspired arousal issues.
These chemicals (I don’t want to call them drugs or medicine) don’t cause affairs. They do create a mindset and opportunity for affairs that wouldn’t exists without them.
In your discussions with your spouse about the affair, you will also need to discuss the chemicals. By not discussing this issue, you may be allowing gasoline to remain too near the fire for your own good.
If you are looking for help with affair recovery, consider joining the support community at Restored Lifestyle.
Best Regards,
Jeff
