What do you make of conjugal fidelity? You and your spouses attitude toward conjugal fidelity is important. That attitude makes all the difference as to whether or not there is an affair in the future of your marriage.
It also makes a difference what your friends and associates make of conjugal fidelity as well. If they don’t respect your fidelity, then your marriage represents ‘fair game’ for their lusts.
If you value conjugal fidelity, some may consider you ‘old-fashioned’, puritanical, archaic, primitive or ‘uninformed’.
I once dated a woman who wanted to be hip and progressive. It was at the point that she suggested open marriage rather than conjugal fidelity that we split ways. At that juncture it was clear that we were headed in different directions.
Critics of conjugal fidelity often ridicule those who cling to it. They’ll view you being of lesser importance than themselves.Those critics may see your clinging to such fidelity as causing problems for those who don’t.
Their devaluing of your marriage is often a precursor to advances being made. When you are seen as less than them, then encroaching on your marriage is viewed as “not really anything wrong”.
If you are one of those who make fun of conjugal fidelity, don’t be surprised when things fall apart in your marriage or the life runs out of it. When there is nothing special about your marriage to separate it from others, then there is little to prevent those same others from poaching on your marriage.
Since attitudes always precede action, ridiculing conjugal fidelity, whether intentionally or in the name of ‘being cool’, your attitude weakens your family bonds.
Your family becomes nothing more than the people you are hanging out with at the time. When there’s nothing special about the bond between you and your wife, then other relationships become of equal value.
When you value conjugal fidelity, you are making a statement that your marriage is special. You are also taking a stand against the ‘anything goes’ mentality of modern life.
When you value marital fidelity, there’s greater security and stability in your home. That greater security is foundational for building the confidence of your children.
When there’s no stability in the marital relationship, there’s no security in the family and without that security, it is hard for any child to build up confidence.
It is not the responsibility of the State, the schools or society to raise your children, it is YOUR responsibility. In a similar vein, it is not the responsibility of the State, the churches or society to provide a stable home environment, it is YOUR responsibility.
It is not the responsibility of your counselor, psychologist, priest or friends to enforce your fidelity to your spouse, it is YOUR responsibility. Responsibility starts with you and your marriage. It starts with you making the decision to be faithful to your spouse, in deed and in attitude.
If you want a stronger marriage, one place to start is to stop ridiculing marital fidelity. Stop hanging out with those who do ridicule marital fidelity, including drinking with them, watching their movies or reading what they write.
Those ideas eventually lead to actions. The ridiculing of marital fidelity is a toxic poison that will weaken your marriage.
If your marriage needs some ‘shoring up’. The “30 Days to a Better Marriage” Program will help the two of you take your marriage from something that’s tolerable to something that you enjoy.
Best Regards,
Jeff
