From the time Jim walked into the Pastor’s office, anyone could tell that something was wrong. His slumped shoulders, slow shuffling walk and labored breathing made it clear that things weren’t going well. A heaviness hung over him that you could feel.
After a few minutes of talking, Jim began sobbing. “My world is falling apart!” he cried out. He shared how that news was more than he could bear.
Between pressured breaths he finally managed sharing his problems. He looked up and asked “Now what do I do?”
His pastor thought for a moment and asked what he could be ‘thankful’ for, referring to I Thessalonians 5:18. A puzzled look came over Jim’s face, “Thankful? for what?”
It’s hard finding much to be thankful about when you’re faced with an affair. For that matter, it’s hard being thankful when any bad or unfortunate event happens.
The thought of being thankful or finding anything to be thankful for struck Jim as ‘weird’. He debated whether to tell the pastor what to do with the ‘thankfulness’ or to try what was suggested.
Jim didn’t understand the importance of the thankfulness piece. In his desperation, he thought “Why not?”
After some consideration, he found a few things he could be thankful for about his situation. As he tried the thankfulness idea, his attitude changed. Rather than being bitter and angry all of the time, he had clarity. The ‘thankfulness’ didn’t bring his wife back right away.
Although it didn’t bring her back, she noticed the change in Jim’s attitude and outlook. He was not the pitiful and depressed person he was before the affair.
Perhaps thankfulness will start changing attitudes in your situation as well. When you hold onto the hurt and only the hurt, it changes you. Thankfulness provides a way of reframing the affair and issues surrounding it.
Sometimes it’s little things like this that make a huge difference in your marriage relationship.
Best Regards,
Jeff
2 Responses
For me learning to press into the discipline of thinking of things to be thankful for has been a lifelong practice
We love in a culture and times where discontent has become the target outcome of advertising
Perfectionism has replaced patient devoting of everything from finance to relationship
My times of challenge I have often not only considered what I deserve had I not come to know my Savior but also what some people ha e to live with it in and they manage to rejoice..as in many countries where people could not even imagine the life that people living here do even with lower income
The answer to a satisfying life is not always more …bigger and massive piles of rich food …but contentment
Godliness with contentment is great gain
What a contest ….when the world and those who don’t realize it that gain is godliness ….how interesting these two verses are right next to each other!
1 Ti 6:5 Perverse disputings of men of corrupt minds, and destitute of the truth, supposing that gain is godliness: from such withdraw thyself.
1 Ti 6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.