Feeling helpless is an uncomfortable sensation. Not only is it uncomfortable, it can be scary as well. I recall when I faced this sensation head on.
I was being sued by a family member in a civil matter for over a million dollars. At that point, I’d never had that much money in my hands, so the thought of having to come up with it was a daunting task.
The deck was being stacked against me. The judge was a friend of the opposing lawyer and managed finding a legal trick for removing my lawyer.
Here I was deep in the unfamiliar waters of law with no lawyer while being sued for a large amount of money. I felt pretty helpless at that point considering I didn’t have the funds for hiring a second lawyer.
I had to consider the uncomfortable question of what can I do? I also had to consider the companion question of what I can’t do. It during such helpless times when it’s easy confusing the two.
Trouble begins when you try controlling what you can’t control and don’t control what you can control. I realized I couldn’t control lawyers or family members as much as I wanted to.
Letting go of even the illusion that I could magically control them was even difficult. Change began when I focused on what I could control.
When it comes to your affair, are you trying to control what you can’t and ignoring what you can control? If so, you could be frustrating yourself.
Learning what you can control is challenging. You may have felt so out of control, you don’t know how or where to even start.
This is where being a member of the support community at Restored Lifestyle can be of help. There you can discuss what you can and can’t control. If you’re like me, you may need some caring reminders to keep you from returning to your controlling ways.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
