Back in the 1950’s one of the slogans used by a utility company in New York was “Dig we must for a greater New York”. Although it’s no longer part of popular culture, the mindset it expressed is.
At the time, the slogan was used as part of promoting growth for the city. These days it has other uses.
After discovering an affair, you may find yourself living by this slogan turned mantra. In your case, “Dig we must” is now a part of your daily life.
You dig, snoop and check every detail you can find about the cheater and their life. Even when things start looking good, it’s hard resisting the urge to dig.
The urge is especially strong if you suspect sexual addiction or the cheater has you so filled with self-doubt you aren’t sure what to believe.
Digging at first is about discovery. Over time, it takes over more and more of your thinking. When left unchecked, it becomes a compulsion.
Recovery means that your focus, including your focus on digging needs changing. All that mental and emotional energy needs redirecting.
Instead of digging, you need better outlets for your recovery. Although it’s become a new habit, that habit interferes with your own recovery from what happened.
With all the digging you have done, do you feel better about yourself? Has it helped or interfered with your relationship?
If your struggle revolves around sexual addiction or the suspicion of it, there’s hope. The special report on “Understanding the Dark World of Sexual Addiction and Affairs” will be going out to members of the Restored Lifestyle site later today, September 15. You still have time to join and receive your copy.
Rather than digging for more on the cheater, finding out what to do and what you are dealing with is a better use of your time.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
