In a conversation with my wife, we talked about the impact of trauma on the body. Even traumas that happened years before leave long-lasting effects.
One of the effects of trauma is referred to as ‘dysregulation’. What this amounts to is that your regular cycles and self-regulation systems turn irregular.
You may have noticed how your mind, emotions and moods are all screwed up by the affair. This is not something that you’re just imagining.
Even though you didn’t have the affair, the dysregulation continues disrupting your life years afterwards. You may have gotten through the initial shock of the affair. Your mind understands what happened, yet you continue facing the haunting after effects. It’s like your mind and body are living in two different worlds.
Medications are a temporary fix to problems like these. The medications initially help you sleep, think and function, but they lose their effectiveness as the dysregulation continues.
As long as the problem of affair trauma hasn’t been resolved, the symptoms continue keeping you ‘on edge’. You may have gotten your spouse back, but you haven’t gotten your peace of mind back.
The dysregulation that happens puts your mind and body into new cycles and patterns. The new patterns change your mood, your thinking and your functioning.
You may have even accepted the dysfunction as your ‘new normal’. When you live with symptoms for long enough, you accept the unhealthy as part of your new life. When you accept the unhealthy as ‘normal’, it keeps you stuck in a trauma mindset.
Getting past this first requires you quit accepting the symptoms as ‘normal’. They aren’t ‘normal’. You don’t have to put up with them as part of your self-punishment.
Instead, you can start making change. When you accept that change is possible, it opens your thinking up to new options. One of the new options is breaking from the dysfunctional patterns.
In the video on “Overcoming Affair Trauma” I help you understand what’s going on and ways of changing it. Rather than staying stuck, you can instead, put those unhealthy patterns behind you.
You don’t have to keep dragging the old symptoms around with you. You no longer have to be defined by your symptoms. Take the step toward changing things by clicking and downloading the video today.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
