We all have moments where our own actions seem to work against us. For me, it’s the tendency to over-complicate things. Whether it’s tackling home repairs or other challenges, I have a habit of choosing the most complicated solution.
But self-defeating behaviors are just bad habits that can be changed. It often takes frustration reaching its breaking point for us to consider alternative choices. And that’s when we can start to make real progress.
Not only do these habits frustrate us, but they also impact our relationships. When others ask why we do what we do, they receive justifications rather than honest appraisals. It becomes a toxic mix of self-defeating behaviors and “why” questions. It leaves you looking in the wrong places and fixing the wrong problems.
Asking “why” in the midst of self-defeat only leads to defensive justifications, rather than productive solutions. We know that our loved ones want us to reconsider our actions and find better options, but asking “why” isn’t the way to accomplish that.
In the downloadable ‘Affair Recovery Workshop,’ I address the danger of “why” questions and offer an alternative approach. This approach raises awareness of other options while avoiding defensive reactions. It also brings motivations and underlying factors to a conscious level, helping us see things we may have missed before.
When my family uses this approach with me, I discover new solutions for fixing things around the house and improving my repair methods.
Breaking the habit of asking “why” is possible, and it offers a better alternative to understanding and addressing self-defeating behaviors. You can rise above the self-defeating habits.
Are you ready to break the cycle and find better solutions? Join me in the downloadable ‘Affair Recovery Workshop’ and start making positive changes today.
Keep It Real,
Jeff
