Years ago, the band known as the Loving Spoonful posed the question, “Do you believe in magic?” The song did well for them.
Magic has ways of changing and transforming things. It can turn a ‘typical’ workplace relationship into an affair. Although it may seem magical, there’s no magic in it.
Any workplace relationship can change into one that threatens your marriage.
Workplace affairs can ruin your life. What seemed so innocent somehow grew into something bigger than you intended.
There are times you may wonder “How did this happen?”
First, workplace affairs don’t just happen. They develop over time. It isn’t rocket science or magic.
In some cases, the affair is the results of an affair villain doing the damage they tend to do. These villains include homewreckers, creepers, poachers and wedding crashers (which I’ve dealt with in previous emails).
In other cases, it began as an innocent relationship that grew too close and blurred lines. It starts with simple compromises where the cheater begins meeting emotional needs in the workplace.
In meeting those needs, it encourages increasing neediness. Besides encouraging neediness, the meeting of needs expands beyond work.
The time they spend together becomes increasingly personal. It goes from meeting business needs to meeting personal needs.
Relationships, including workplace ones, have ways of expanding to fill the time and attention you give them.
At first the relationship may be innocent looking, with cards and cakes. These little gestures have ways of turning into other gestures filled with expectations.
The more attention invested in a workplace relationship, the greater the expectations become along with more emotional investment.
It’s not that cards and cakes are bad, they have ways of turning the workplace into a hotbed of feeling and emotion.
This is one of the dangers of the ‘new workplace’ that encourages more of these kinds of interactions. What begins as admiration can easily turn into affection and infatuation. They start with good intentions of ‘just being nice’, yet morph into something not so nice.
When needs are being met in the workplace that should be met in the home, problems quickly spin out of control. Loyalties begin developing that compete with their loyalties to family.
Having healthy boundaries is a good way of reducing the risk of workplace affairs. Another way of reducing the risk is making your marriage stronger by making it better. There are things you can do that improve your own marriage and lessen the threat of outside influences.
An ‘okay’ marriage makes it vulnerable to the threat of workplace affairs. Rather than being the victim, you can take action that reduces the threat of workplace affairs.
In the “30 Days to a Better Marriage” product you can learn ways of strengthening your own marriage. It can help change the direction things are headed.
Order your copy today and you can start the new year with a stronger, healthier marriage.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
