It’s always enjoyable hearing my sons discuss their daily adventures. Although they’re fully grown men now, the adventures continue. One of them shared how a co-worker decided trying out a motorized skateboard. The saying, “It’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt” was played out when the co-worker had an accident, breaking his leg in three places.
Some people think a brief affair is fun. While growing up they called it “a little action on the side”. Although, like the skateboard, it starts off fun, until someone gets hurt. There’s even a saying “Love is all fun and games until someone loses and eye or gets pregnant”.
For me, the saying doesn’t do affairs justice. It makes them sound like ‘harmless’ fun. In my mind, “All affairs end in death”. My version sounds harsh, but I’ve seen it proven true many times. The saying is nothing more than a lying trap.
With affairs, someone or something dies. It may be your affections, your dreams, your security, your family or your capacity to love. In tragic situations, even more is lost.
It’s ironic that warnings are put on high voltage wires, or flammable chemicals being transported, yet affairs don’t have warning labels. If affairs were a product, I’m sure the bureaucrats at the product safety branch of government would deem them a hazard to your marriage. After taking that action, there would be a recall on affairs due to their defective dysfunctional state.
Perhaps one reason for the lack of warning labels is the fact that divorce courts are a huge money maker. The legal system knows that there’s more money to be made in family break-ups than in their repair.
By the time you or someone in your family gets hurt, it’s too late for prevention. Any so called “fun and games” are over. The only kind of gaming still going on is dancing around admitting to and accepting responsibility for the affair.
In terms of fun, it’s not there. That’s why my definition of fun is when everyone is enjoying something. With an affair, not everyone is enjoying themselves, so it doesn’t meet the definition of fun. When only one person is having fun, it’s either selfishness or cruelty.
Actually, this is one reason I created the Affair Recovery Workshop. It has many built-in features allowing you to leverage brain hacks to get your spouse talking, takes you through a special sequence designed to reduce unnecessary drama, and guides you in dealing with the root of the problems.
Best Regards,
Jeff
