One weekend, years ago, a teenager named Norman took me with him down to Galveston in order to learn how to surf. Being unfamiliar with surfing except from the Annette Funicello movies, there were many lessons to learn.
After waxing the surfboard with a tropical smelling product called "Mr. Zogg's Sex Wax" we began my lessons. The first lesson was that when you fall off your board, get back up. That first day, I did my share of falling off the board. Eventually, I was able to get up on my knees on the surfboard.
Although I had body surfed before, it was not the same thrill as riding a wave on a board. Even when the thrill only lasted seconds, it was enjoyable and exhilarating.
Norman explained that if you give up after the first time you fall off, you're never going to learn surfing. At that point, you give up and quit trying. Mastering surfing requires a lot of falling off and getting back on your board.
In the same way, when you are in the recovery from an affair, when you fall off, the most important thing is to get back up. There's many different ways to fall, yet when it happens, the more important things is getting back up.
Successfully recovering from an affair takes practice. You fall, you get back up. Whether you are the betrayed or the cheater, each of you falls at times during recovery. It's important that when you fall that you get back up.
Another step you can take is obtaining the video "Overcoming Affair Relapse". The video won't keep you from falling, but it will help keep you from making the same mistakes over and over along with preparing you for getting back up after those falls.