During recovery from an affair, it is often difficult to tell yourself the truth. Although difficult, this is an important task that must be done. You will need to honestly deal with what has happened. Be honest with yourself about what your partner did, what you did, and what it means. Twisting and distorting the truth may ease the initial pain, but it does not help with the healing. For the healing to be complete, deal with the issues honestly.
For example: If you or your partner has a sex addiction, or drug addiction-admit it. After admitting what is going on or what went on, accept it. Accept it warts and all. If you did it or they did it admit it and accept it. It is at that point then forgiveness can be helpful. When you don’t tell yourself the truth, forgiveness is always incomplete. When you don’t tell yourself the truth, then you begin making excuses for yourself or your partner. Those excuses often lead to you believing lies about the situation. You may not want to face the reality of what happened, but whether or not you like it or approve of it, it happened. Accepting what happened does not mean you approve or condone it. Your approval or condoning is optional, acceptance is not. It is important that you accept it for what it is. Accepting the truth for what it is brings healing. Denying the truth prolongs the suffering, it not make it worse. The choice is yours-Do you accept the truth or not?
Best Regards,
Jeff Murrah
