One of the problems couples struggle with in recovering from cheating and infidelity concerns compromising. Normally compromising is good for relationships, yet when cheating is involved, couples are often not clear on their boundaries. The lack of clarity concerning boundaries leads to compromise after compromise after compromise. Although it sounds healthy, the compromising which occurs after cheating often consists of one party caving in on their position and the other not giving much of anything up. Although it is called compromising, in reality it is more often giving ground. A true compromise involves both parties changing their positions. When the compromise is one-sided, it is not really a compromise. In my experience, what often occurs is that one of the spouses surrenders their right of accountability just to keep the peace. That is not a compromise. In such situations, someone is trying to avoid guilt reactions in response to their behaviors.
Best Regards,
Jeff Murrah
