For generations, the metaphor often used in association with affair is that of a fire. This metaphor has been powerful in conveying both the power unleashed and the destructive potential involved with affairs.
Like a fire, it provides warmth and comfort. As the fire grows, it wants even more fuel. Likewise as an affair grows, it will want larger parts of the people involved. The more fuel, the more heat. With greater heat is also greater comfort and greater danger. There is also the fascination of watching. Watching the fire, watching the people watching the unfolding of what occurs. As the fire continues, it transforms and changes everything it touches. Affairs also have a tendency to grow and eventually spiral out of control. As the affair spins out of control, it also spins the emotions out of control and transforms everything it touches.
When a fire is going strong, there is always smoke. The presence of smoke is sure sign a fire is underway. Affairs also have tell tale signs of their existence which give away its players. Affairs also transform the lovers, the adulterers and the resolute spouse. Even when they are not talked about, the destruction remains.
Fires need constant feeding it you hope to enjoy the heat and light they produce. In the case of affairs, they will need time, money and other resources to keep them going. The time, money and other resources will need to come from somewhere. You cannot give a lover something that you do not possess. Oftentimes, the adulterer will give the lover things that rightfully belong to the spouse, which intensifies the feelings and reactions associated with the affair.
Fires can leave permanant scars. Affair also leave permanant scars. The scars may end up touching your parents, children and grandchildren in ways you never expected. The bigger the affair, the larger the scars.
Fire is worth studying if you want to understand an affair and how it works.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
