Some couples while recovering from affairs find themselves dealing with ‘ghost affairs’. A ‘ghost affair’ is the term I use in referring to the residual image or afterglow of an affair. What often happens is that the infidel reminisces about the affair relationship. These reminisces often take on a romanticizing of the events and persons involved. When engaged in the ghost affair, the person is mentally and emotionally reliving the events of the affair. Physically they may be in the home, yet the other parts of their being are still engaged and connected to the adulterous party.
When ghost affairs are occurring, there is often an emotional reaction from the resolute spouse. It is as if there is an instant replay of the affair all over again. Marriage relationships do not work well with three or more people caught in a drama triangle. The marriage relationship works best with two people loyally committed to one another. The entrance of a third party either physically or through ‘ghost affairs’ often has emotional repercussions.
Ghost affairs can also occur with widowers and widows as well when they are emotionally reliving their previous marriage with their now dead spouse.
Ghost affairs, like all other infidelities needs to be discussed and worked through. Although the person in the midst of such a relationship will deny that there is any relationship going on, the resolute spouse senses what is going on. The emotional pain will still need to be addressed.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
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