Observing how people deal with affairs provides startling insights into their values and priorities. One area where there are often surprises concerns who or what they go to for comfort. When the resolute spouse finds out about the affair, where or who do they go to first? That first choice says a great deal about what they select as their source of comfort. It also reveals what their values truly are. Many times there are two sets of values that people have. There is the one that sounds respectable and that is often stated in public. The other one is the set of values that they live by. Their source of comfort, their source of strength. Surprisingly many people set up appointments with Dr. Turning Leaf, Dr. Ernest & Julio Gallo, Dr. Jack Daniels or some other variation of physician in a bottle.
They may talk about how the go to a source outside of themselves who is all-powerful in order to help, but what they really go to for comfort is contained in a bottle or in some cases, pill form. Such discrepencies reveal their true source of power and comfort. If you are one of those who has two sets of values, you may need to readjust priorities in dealing with the affair.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
