Being away from one’s spouse is often a difficult time. Whether you are a military spouse or have spouse that travels a lot, dealing with their absence is often a high risk time for affairs.
There strategies that can be used to reduce the risk. These strategies will not remove the risk, but they will make it more manageable.
1. It is important to stay busy and focused. Temptations are not so unbearable when one is busy.
2. Avoid places where the risk is high. Do not go to bars, clubs, honky tonks, ice houses or any other place where alcohol flows freely and people make passes. Alcohol and drug use can reduce your inhibitions. Those inhibitions are there to protect you from making mistakes. Avoid substances that dull them especially when you are in a social setting.
3. If you go places, try to go with friends and associates that will reduce temptations. Going out as a group will reduce the likelihood of you being tempted.
4. Take care of yourself. Take care of yourself physically and emotionally. When you are not taking care of yourself or exercising, you may not be caring for yourself in other areas as well. Health self-care is important for you to keep up your morale in their absence. Although gyms are a good activity, they are becoming pick up spots. Exercise caution when people show an unusual interest in you.
5. Maintain communication with your spouse. Keeping the lines of communication open is another way of reducing risks. You may even want to work on a project together, such as the both of you reading a book from your separate locations or other similar activity.
6. Let your spouse know your schedule. Knowing ones schedule and travel itineraries often help create a sense of routine in uncertain situations.
These are some strategies to help cope with the loneliness. As you put some of these in place, other ideas may come up. Feel free to share them with me, especially when they work well.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
