It is uncanny how cheaters have the audacity to blame you for their affairs. If you find evidence on their phone or computer, the accusation is that “you don’t trust me”, or “that’s private! You are not to be looking at that!” or some variation of such statements. They actually take offense at you investigating them. They totally dismiss the gravity of the affair they are having, instead, they make a federal case out of you going through their phone or email. “How dare you…” is the attitude they have.
The only thing more audacious than their accusations is how many spouses fall for it. Some of you actually fall for it and accept the blame they are putting on you for their choices and actions. You need to wake up and see the problem for what it is. THEY are the one who decided to stray/cheat/be the adulterer/… THEY stepped outside of the marriage. THEY are the one who lied.
For more on dealing with the affair, consider my e-book on surviving your partners affair, where I deal with telling yourself the truth.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
One Response
My husband did not do this at the beginning, right after D-day. But now he gets irritated when I check his computer history or check our phone account. He says it’s enough already, and that he is being treated like a child. I tell him that I will decide when it’s enough, and this treatment is a small price to pay for what he’s done.