In reading an article the other day, I was struck by the author mentioning how even the word duty is becoming obsolete. In many areas,
including marriage, duty has been replaced by ‘responsibility’. You may think, that such a change is not a big deal, I assure you it is a big deal. When you have a duty to your spouse, you go above and beyond the call of duty. You do everything for your spouse and protect them any way that you can. When you have a responsibility, you merely fulfill the job requirements of your position. Duty often requires that you all that you can and then some. When you or your spouse have a ‘responsibility’ mindset, they may see cheating as ‘no big deal’ if they are fulfilling their responsibilities (or job duties) as a husband and a father. Duty would demand that you maintain loyalty to your spouse, whatever the cost in terms of fun, promotion, etc. Responsibility, on the other hand, only requires you do what is reasonable and responsible.
You and your spouse may use the word ‘duty’, yet treat your position as a ‘responsibility’. In such cases, there is confusion about the words and their meanings. Duty is a lifetime commitment, while responsibility focuses on your performance in your role. This confusion is not limited to your marriage, this is a trend in modern culture, which often seeks to water down commitment in marriage and excuse profligacy in the name of how we are all ‘sexual beings’. This is just another way that marriages are under assault and being broken down.
This is a good time to restore the foundations of your marriage, your commitments and even the words you use.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
