Once your spouse cheats, you lose your peace of mind. Even in the best of circumstances, with them coming back to you after a brief stray, the loss of your peace of mind remains.
With losing your peace of mind, there comes a hyper-vigilance. Any situation that you or the cheater are in is viewed with suspicion. Every email or text is scrutinized.
Instead of looking behind every rock and stone for demons, you look behind them for potential cheating situations. Suddenly anyone whose friendly with your spouse becomes a threat.
Your spouse may tell you “There’s no threat”. The intellectual part of your mind may tell you that there’s no threat, yet the fearful part of you doesn’t believe them.
Your affair radar has been activated and now it won’t turn off.
You second guess the motives behind any smiles. Your stomach is always churning 24-hours a day.
Your spouse may even accuse you of being paranoid. When it gets extreme, they accuse you of trying to read minds.
It’s no longer something you can hide. Even your friends and family members comment on you being edgy, nervous or anxious.
There was a time you needed the hyper-vigilance. The problem is that now it won’t turn off. It keeps your stress level up day in and out.
Staying alert all the time has consequences. It wears you out from the inside out.
That stress literally starts breaking down your bodies organ systems. It taking you apart piece by piece.
What you’re experiencing is known as ‘Affair Trauma’. The good news is that there are ways of resetting your systems. There are things you can do that restore your body and mind.
There are ways of slowing down your mind and calming your body.
You may not have thought of what you went through as a trauma. Your body and mind know it’s a trauma and are treating it like one. That trauma is also stressing out your body each day you delay dealing with it.
The intellectual side of you may know the affair is over, but your body never received that message.
I address how you can start calming your body and mind in my video on Overcoming Affair Trauma. That video is one of the many resources you’ll have access to with membership to the Restored Lifestyle site. Join today and start winding down.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
