Are you left wondering how did that happen?
When you and your spouse aren’t getting along, do you wonder “how did that happen?” At that moment, it feels like your head is spinning.
Do your arguments between you and your spouse are so routine, that you feel like it’s the same fight over and over again. The conflict goes in circles rather than helping the two of you move forward.
If either of this sound familiar and describe what you experience, you don’t have to remain locked into the cycle of drama that has taken you hostage. Change is possible.
Although change is possible, it could be that you’re so locked into you automatic responses and running on automatic pilot, you don’t feel it’s possible. When your automatic comments and responses dominate your marriage, you’re not communicating.
Not only that, you’re not really present at those times. You may be in the room, but you’re really not engaging with your spouse.
Changing this pattern requires you turn off your automatic thoughts and responses. You may claim it’s your nature or something else. The truth is those automatic thoughts are keeping you from getting close to others.
You may feel that it’s protecting yourself, even though it pushes others away. Getting real means you’re going to have to take some risks. One risk is that of actually engaging in communication with your spouse.
This means you’ll need to turn off those automatic responses. Your automatic responses are turning you into a relationship porcupine.
Engaging your spouse is a good start. Now you’ll need to know what to talk about and how to establish the closeness your marriage needs.
This is where the video “Let’s Talk: Hurting People and Healing Questions” comes in. It guides you through those times you’re not sure what to say. It gives you direction and guidance in rebuilding your marital communication.
Those old unhealthy patterns can be put behind you. When you start engaging and connecting with your spouse, you’ll be amazed at what kind of difference it makes.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
