You’ve likely heard the term trophy wife bounced around. Although the term ‘trophy husband’ hasn’t received the same attention, it’s also a thing in some circles.
You may have a wonderful marriage with a trophy spouse. There’s also a danger that comes with trophy spouses that puts you at risk for an affair.
This danger, like a well-camouflaged poisonous snake is so hidden that few of you are aware of the danger. The danger lies in the thinking associated with the trophy mentality.
When you start viewing spouses as trophies, marriage becomes all about status. It’s not that them not being valued or precious.
When you start viewing your marriage as a status symbol, you’re in danger.
The danger that comes with status marriages is that you have to continue upgrading in order to maintain your status. This is where the risk of affairs comes in.
When the luster dulls on your trophy spouse, you’re in danger of looking for a new one. Maintaining the status requires continuous upgrades. You may find your eyes wandering without intending them to.
When your mind has already accepted marriage as a status symbol, it sends a message to your brain concerning ways of maintaining your status. You continue chasing after the thrills that go with the status.
It’s not bad having an attractive spouse, that you consider a catch. The danger zone is when you view them as a trophy for display on your mantle.
Trophies are about having and maintaining status. Even when you parade them around, you run the risk of status seeking types reacting with jealousy and attempting taking your trophy from you.
Besides the danger of upgrading, the status marriage threatens you with distraction. You start focusing on external attractiveness under the false assumption that this is the most important quality.
Instead of building a healthy marriage in areas of emotions and quality of your marriage relationship, your mindset focuses on externals. You may even fall prey to buying your way out of problems rather than solving them together.
If you’ve fallen prey to an affair associated with a status marriage, there’s hope. In the video “Help for the Cheater: Starting the Road to Recovery”, you can know what to do in order to start turning things around.
The marriage as a status symbol way of thinking creates one of those high risk of affair situations. Rather than being blind-sided by those dangers, you can instead be taking steps at turning things around.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
