Category: Waking up and confronting the cheater
Condemining the easy choices
It may be hard for you to consider the affair from the cheaters perspective. For whatever reason, needs were not being met within the marriage. You will need to
Stuck in ‘instant replay’
Although you are in real life, there are times when dealing with affairs, that you feel like you are stuck in ‘instant replay’ mode. The same fights, the same
Are you trigger unhappy?
You are familiar with the term “trigger happy”. In such cases, those persons enjoy pulling the trigger of a tool or object. In a similar manner, you may be
Sowing and Reaping Lies
Cheaters do not play fair. Their cheating is testimony to how they try to bend the rules in their favor. They often believe that the ‘rules’ apply to others
Distractions and Cheating
Although secrets are the main entree of Cheating, distractions are a side order. Cheaters often distract their spouses from what they are really up to. Holidays such as Thanksgiving
When they can’t stop
In working with the addictive behaviors, one of the simple truths is that ‘they do not think like other people think’. This also applies to cheating. Although a healthy
There is no exonorating an affair
Exonerating an event means that you erase the event as if it were gone. This can not happen with cheating. The cheater can be forgiven, but their actions can
Who will be blamed today?
Besides secrets, anger, and lies, another of the qualities that are part of the package deal you receive with cheating is …blaming. Blaming often starts even before the cheating
Cheating and Anger, Part II
Assuming that you have managed containing your anger, which I addressed in part I, you are now ready for more ways of dealing with your anger. Before you reduce
Lost in the fog
When you find yourself lost in the fog that happens with cheating, it is a miserable experience. You feel lost, unable to think clearly, lethargic, restless and directionless. Although
