There are many books and literature about affairs in the marketplace. With the plethora of products there are also many agendas.Many bookstores have whole sections on ‘marriage’ of which a notable portion contain affair helps.
Some of these agendas may supercharge your sex life, but destroy the spirit of oneness in your marriage. Typically those items that advocate ‘open marriage’ are not conducive to developing a spirit of oneness desired in a Christian marriage.
Instead, it fosters two people each having enhanced ‘selfishness’ in their marriage. To me, that sounds like the creation of a two-headed monster.
These books may improve your sex life, but the emotional and spiritual alienation that is also produced often leave the partners feeling more distant from each other than ever. In considering resources look into them carefully. Consider if the author has a successful marriage.
By shifting your focus to sensual areas and encouraging you to indulge in unlimited sexual pleasure, you’ll find physical fulfillment. With the affair, you likely will have more physical fulfillment.
What you won’t have is a special relationship with your spouse or spirit of oneness in your marriage. You also won’t have a clear conscience.
Consider where the author is coming from and what their beliefs toward marriage are. Those beliefs will find their way into the material. Are they advocating things that improve your marriage in the short run or the long run?
Short-term fixes never really fix your relationship. It’s a band-aid. It gets your mind off of the hurts, but doesn’t bring real healing or long term relief.
Although the ‘anything goes’ mentality sounds nice, when the rubber meets the road, affairs and free-for-alls create dissension and alienation both within the partners and between them. Before you “do what the book says”, consider what direction it is taking you.
Best Regards,
Jeff
