The sensation that often accompanies the discovery of an affair is that of loss. The loss is often intense and deep. Many liken it to feeling like they have fallen in a hole. The more they think about the affair and what they lost, the deeper they fall into the hole. The hole turns into a pit or abyss when we quit seeing light at the top. When one has fallen in so deep there is no light. The light at the top is one of the signs of hope. When the light is no longer visible, we feel there is no hope.
So how does one get out of the pit?
First, quit falling into it, by focusing on loss and disappointment. Such sentiments are good for a pity party, but that quickly gets boring since no one else really wants to hear about out misery.
Second, learn to change one’s thinking. The thoughts we feed our mind with are the programming for our brain. When the programming keeps turning out rotten data, the problem is not the data, the problem is the programming. Change the programming.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
