The debate on whether one stays or goes is tough. It is never pleasant to have to consider such choices. There are times that you need to go and go quickly. If your life is in danger, there is no debate about what you need to do. When life is in danger, you need to go. If he is choking you or has choked you before, you need to go and go quickly, especially in the time after an affair is uncovered. During that time emotions run high and people find themselves reacting rather than thinking.
In some cases, it may be best to stay and work things out. This is a time that the two of you need each other the most, but each of your are unavailable. When your walls are up, it is a mistake to zing your spouse for not reaching out to you, since they couldn’t reach you if they tried. You may need a new welcome mat rather than looking for the door.
It is important to count the cost of both staying and leaving. Look at the cost now and into the future. Consider physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual dimensions of your choices. Leaving may get you out of the pain, but it may not fix anything. My e-book contains many other things to consider during this time of uncertainty if you are looking for further direction.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
