When family members assemble, there is an incredible amount of power. It can be used for good or for bad purposes. God designed the family to be a powerful force that can impact those who belong to it.
When an affair happens, the lovers often think that it is a ‘victimless’ wrong. This is just another lie they tell themselves. An affair disrupts trust not only in the marriage, it also weakens the family as a whole. It hurts all those who know the cheater or the one who was cheated on. Although families seem to turn a blind eye to some indiscretions, make not mistake, they notice what was done. You may think it has been forgotten, it has not. Families have long memories. They remember who to trust, who is reliable, who has betrayed the family.
If you doubt the power of families, let the assemble for a wedding, birth, funeral or holiday get together and you will feel the power. I suspect that many ‘family problems’ stem back to damage that one has inflicted on the family and family remembers. It is family that keep oppressive husbands and wayward wives in check. Many times the power of the family is not understood or used in responding to affairs. Rather than allow the natural pressure to mold and shape its members, people often run away, take pills or avoid them. The joke is that no matter how many miles one runs, the family can still touch a person, even without saying a word.
I recognize that you may need to avoid family members for safety reasons. Safety is always a primary concern, it is one of the few things that trumps the power of family and releases a person from any guilt induced by family.
If you are caught in a tough affair situation, rather than ignore the family and keep them out, think twice. Family may be your best option for reaching the cheater in a way that they will listen.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
