When the cheater proclaims that oral sex is not sex (or any other type of sex is not sex), you have a big problem. When that happens, they have so changed the definition of what sex is, that you and they are not talking the same language. You may want to ask them, “If oral sex is not sex, then if someone did it to your child, would you consider it sex then?” In all likelihood, they will get angry and claim that you are being outrageous to suggest such a thing, or that you are a horrible person, or something like that. The question is outrageous, but it wakes the cheater up to the errors in their own thinking. When the same definitions are applied to their own teenage children, somehow then it changes. That is because when the activity is put into those terms, they wake up. Sometimes cheaters have to be shocked in order to see how “out of touch” they have become due to their rationalizing of their behavior. They have encroached so much that they do not recognize sexual behaviors and infidelity for what it is.
The problem is extensive. In a study conducted a few years ago among college students, only 20% of young adults consider oral sex a form of sex. Than means that 80% of young adults do not consider oral sex…sex. It is unclear if this represents all young adults or just those who answered the survey at some college campus.
Sexual touches are sexual touches. When you marry, you agree to remain loyal in sharing your body with your spouse. They have exclusivity to it. Sharing it with someone else is a violation of that exclusive arrangement.
There are times you need to confront the cheater and their twisted logic for what it is…twisted.
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Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
3 Responses
Good post…it should be brought to the attention of the various educational ‘attempts’ in the school systems don’t you think ….?
Zaza,
I had not thought about how some of the schools ‘program’ students into thinking that ‘oral sex is not sex’ or that oral sex is somehow more acceptable. Some sex education has served to weaken the morals of many young people while they are at school. The educators may be well-intentioned, but the programmatic aspects of their educational programs may have weakened many marriages.
If reports can be believed I think you are correct , Oral sex also has dangers of disease that many do not think of either …HPV is one …among others
It has set a ‘course’ of thinking in the young that is a dangerous foundation for life long damages to the children themselves and future relationships. With even more fractured families the opportunity to witness ongoing relationship between the god designed genders of man and woman as they navigate the daily challenges that arise in marriage there has been a great opening for the many ways that perversions offer the ‘optional ‘ views of what a marriage and a family are in truth
Weakening the nation has come upon us through this insideous means …Krusheve was not kidding about ‘we will bury you ‘ …and they did it without firing a shot….Humanist in “sheeps clothing” INDEED!