When you buy art from a pornographer, it shouldn’t surprise you that it contains pornographic material. In a similar manner, when you seek advice and counsel from those who promote pornographic thinking, you may be asking for the hair of the dog that bit you in the first place.
Pornographic thinking has crept into churches, counselors offices, and schools. They may join with you in viewing pornography as a problem, yet continue promoting a mindset promoting ‘The primacy of sex’.
They may not view what they are doing as promoting pornographic thinking, but ignorance of their contribution does not mean that they are innocent. One of the hallmarks of sexual addiction is the idea the “sex is the most important aspect of their lives”.
If sex is the most important part of a sex addict’s life, what’s the difference between that and churches where ‘The Primacy of Sex” is preached?
When you see this same message being presented in hardcore films and pulpits, schools and chat rooms, there’s a problem. The only difference is often the level of graphic content.
When you make sex the most important aspect of your life, then every interaction is viewed in terms of ‘how good is the sex?’ You evaluate your life and marriage in terms of sex alone.
If there is not enough sex, or exciting enough sex then you assume that your marriage is in trouble. The sex addict has the same kind of mindset.
I don’t know about you, but when something walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, to me…it’s a duck.
When you have pornographic thinking, then your solutions are going to be nothing more than watered down versions of pornographic thinking.
Those promoting this kind of thinking may encourage you to flirt more, do more sexual experiments, bring more sex toys into your home or something else along those lines. All such interventions continue feeding into the mindset that ‘sex is the most important aspect of their marriage and their life’.
Sex is an important aspect, but when any one aspect dominates the others and takes over, it becomes freakish.
With pornographic thinking, sex becomes freakish, bizarre and unnatural.
The pornographic thinking is not a just a male problem either. Keep in mind that back in 2007, there were 13 million women clicking on porn sites.
Those numbers are eight years old. The problem has continued growing since then. The women visiting those sights are not just loose women. This includes respectable business women, women in churches, teachers, mothers, etc.
In many cases, sex addictions began with pornographic thinking. The thinking eventually led to action, action repeated over time became habits. Those habits, when continued over time became lifestyles.
When the pornographic thinking kicks in, marriage is no longer about compassion, cooperation, or commitment. It instead boils down to the selfish idea of whether or not you are being satisfied.
This same question of self-satisfaction is often one that cheaters rehearse over and over in their mind. As pornographic thinking takes over, it takes those effected on a roller coaster ride of seeking a level of satisfaction that is never reached. They are always looking for that ultimate high, but never finding it.
If you have a spouse who is searching for answers, consider what will happen if they sit under the preaching of someone promoting pornographic thinking.
When they are told that sex is the most important part of their lives and marriage, is that going to encourage or discourage an affair?
If your marriage has been influenced in a negative way by pornographic theology, there’s hope. The ‘Affair Recovery Workshop‘ not only helps you recover from affairs, it helps recover from the mindset of pornographic theology as well.
Best Regards,
Jeff
