One of the problems with the work place whore or ‘work wives‘ is that they don’t wear signs around them letting you know the danger to your marriage that lies ahead. Let me tell you the story of Sandra and Tom to show you what can happen.
Sandra knew Tom was married from the time they began working at the same business. Since her husband also worked at the business where he was frequently distracted, she often did whatever she wanted. On seeing Tom along with his physique and personality, she decided she wanted him.
Sandra threw herself at Tom every chance she got. Sandra made it convenient to bump into Tom and talk with him on breaks, and any opportunity for socializing. It started with those meetings and soon escalated. All the planned close contact was paying off for her.
Since she was young, attractive, professionally dressed and carried herself well, she was never suspected of any wrong doing. This way, she was able to hide what was actually going on.
Sandra eventually met Tom in dark corners of the garage or invited him to her office behind closed doors. She managed turning her office into a pay by the hour hotel room.
Their sneaky meetings soon became the talk of all the other employees. In order to avoid suspicion, she told her husband they were ‘just friends’. Since he was often busy or distracted, he believed what she told him.
Sandra even befriended Tom’s wife. She feigned a concern for her and Tom’s family. Sandra convinced Tom’s wife that the relationship she had with Tom was a ‘work friendship’ and posed no threat. In her mind, it worked for her husband, so why not Tom’s wife?
Sandra’s husband continued ignoring the secretive meetings, even though something was nagging him inside. Eventually he managed sneaking off with her cell phone. “I wonder” he said to himself as he began exploring what the phone could tell him.
On finding numerous calls to him both during the day and after hours on into the night, it struck him as odd. Then he checked her text messages “Damn!” He discovered she was sending Tom nude photos of herself. He thought, “She never did that for me. What gives?” At that point, he knew they were more than ‘just friends’.
Now that he was on to her, he waited for a chance to ‘catch her in the act’. Eventually the time came when she was caught. On being caught, she quickly claimed that “It’s Tom’s fault!. He came onto me and wouldn’t leave me alone”. She continued her diatribe making it a point to include references to Tom’s wife and how even she threatened her. She felt trapped. Sandra quickly made up a wild story weaving together sexual harassment and how Tom ‘stalked her’ around the business.
Sandra’s excuses were believed by her boss. Since he had never seen the photos or text messages, he assumed that Sandra was the victim of sexual harassment in the workplace. Since the business had a ‘no tolerance’ policy toward sexual harassment, Tom was ‘let go’.
The situation of Sandra and Tom was not fair by any means. Although it’s not fair, it is quite common. Situations like this one happen. You or your spouse may find yourself losing a job or career due to baseless lies being told.
Affairs are never fair. Everybody will be hurt and suffer a loss. Some of you will suffer more loss than others. No matter how much you or others may talk about what’s fair, nothing about an affair is fair. There will be lies, accusations, threats covered by more lies, more accusations, more secrets and more threats.
The other party may be the work place whore, yet that often does not mean much. No matter what their reputation is, they may have connections and relationships that mean anyone foolish enough to cheat with them gets fired.
These days, rumors and accusations have tremendous impact. They can ruin people. Even what may have begun as innocently as going out for drinks after work can turn into something no one ever imagined. If there is an affair, you’ll want to deal with it as soon as you suspect something.
Rather than waiting until its’ too late, intervention is needed early. When it comes to affairs the earlier the intervention, the greater the chance of your marriage recovering from an affair. One reason for this is that you are not yet overwhelmed by the emotional trauma of the affair. Once that hits, it becomes harder to think, more challenging keeping your emotions calm and next to impossible to problem solve.
The Affair Recovery Workshop can help you deal with the issues surrounding an affair before all the destructive fallout happens. Taking action before the confusion, trauma and emotional upheaval occurs is always a good choice.
Best Regards,
Jeff
