For many years I held the belief that “Ideas have consequences“. Good ideas have good consequences and bad ideas take you places you don’t want to go. You may have pleasure doing it, yet someone’s going to have to clean up the mess.
One 19th century thinker put it simply in stating “A bad book is a big thief”. He went on to point out how they rob you of your time and good principles. His warning went off in my mind on reading about a new book being promoted by Wednesday Martin.
In promoting it, she states “I’m trying to give women permission through data and opinions of experts I’ve interviewed to feel less weird about their urges, fantasies and desire to be sexually adventurous.” If that doesn’t make her intentions clear, she states that her book gives women a ‘hall pass’.
Yes, this is a hall pass in every sense of the popular culture meaning. Her suggested pathway to adventure includes watching porn, reading erotic literature and stop feeling ashamed. On reading her intentions and promotional material I wonder “Is she promoting freedom or sexual addiction?”
I compared her intentions with the sexual addiction checklist compiled by sex addiction expert, Patrick Carnes and started checking off boxes.
Fantasy sex, seductive role sex, exhibitionistic sex, …check, check, check. On her promotional tour, she sported a travel vibrator around her neck, making her intentions clear.
She knows her audience are looking for a rush of hormones. To me that sounds like someone catering to the chemical highs of addiction.
If you’ve read my emails and posts, you’d know about the dangers that come with uncontrolled fantasies, and their role in affairs.
Although she says her book gives “permission not to step out or cheat” , yet if they do that their husband responds with “What did you expect? That’s how women are.” I still wonder “How you can not give permission to cheat, yet dismiss cheating at the same time?”
Giving double messages like that is often used as a ploy in confusing the readers brain. When your brain is confused, it makes you more likely to be influenced by the message it contains.
My question is “Does reading such a book makes your marriage stronger and more affair proof, or does it threaten your relationship and weaken it?” If such a book and its message weakens your marriage, it qualifies as a ‘bad book’.
This is especially true when you and your spouse are recovering from an affair. Being pointed in the wrong direction spells trouble for your marriage.
At the membership site, Restored Lifestyle, you have access to programs that strengthen your marriage and improve intimacy in healthy ways that don’t increase the risk of an affair. Join today and start making your marriage stronger.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
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