Although selfishness is one of the major factors behind affairs, there’s another hidden factor that makes them destructive. This second factor is often overlooked or downplayed.
This second major factor behind affairs and their destructiveness is ‘ignorance’. Ignorance shows up in many ways from ignorance of the affair to ignorance about ways of dealing with the affair.
Ignorance about ways of dealing with affairs keeps them going. Ignorance also contributes to affair relapse.
When you don’t know how to deal with the affair or prevent relapse, it opens the door to more. There are more high risk situations, more relapses, and more damage.
Marriages that could have been saved are ruined by ignorance. Not knowing how to deal with the issues contributing to affair relapse makes them possible and likely.
Ignorance leads to inaction. When you don’t know what to do, you do nothing.
When nothing has really changed in your home, what motivation is there for the cheater to change their ways? They may change a few things on the outside, but the change you need most are the ones on the inside.
There are ways you can help the cheater with their inner struggles. When you don’t know what to do, you end up either doing nothing or fixing the wrong problems.
Confusion as to what to do is what leads to inaction. Apathy has certainly ruined many marriages, but ignorance has ruined more.
Not knowing how to connect, how to love, how to intervene and how to decode what’s going on with the cheater can be remedied. These are fixable problems.
The cheater made some bad choices. Not knowing what to do will keep you from taking action that can repair the damage from their bad choices.
In the video “Preventing Affair Relapse“ you can learn what they need to do and what you need to do. Instead of ignorance, you can know what you’re dealing with along with how to do it.
Ignorance is a factor with affairs you can do something about.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
