Yesterday, I dealt with starting to like your spouse again. It focused on the first step of removing barriers that are creating distance between the two of you.
An important part of recovering from an affair is rebuilding your marriage relationship. Once you remove the first barrier of resentment, the next obstacle is that of potential.
When you send messages to your brain that limit your relationship it stifles any potential. If you see your marriage going nowhere, it creates a self-defeating mindset.
Those limits need adjusting. You can reset your mind in a way that removes those limits.
The limits may have been put there to protect yourself or for damage control. Whatever the reason for them being there, when you’re working on rebuilding your marriage, they need adjustment.
One way of adjusting them in a healthy way is by being open to change. Instead of saying what you won’t allow to happen again, try being open to possibilities.
Being open to the possibility of change and allowing them a chance is a good start. I’m not asking you to be foolish, I’m instead asking you to be open to them making changes.
Instead of being your own worst enemy by assuming your spouse will NEVER change, I want you to at least entertain the possibility of them making some changes. Your attitude in this area either opens or closes options.
I also know the road to marriage recovery after an affair has ups and downs. There will be some mistakes along the way. In asking you to be open to them making changes, I want you to give yourself the option of changes happening.
A good way of being open to change is being willing to trust again. Trusting them isn’t a blind game. There are specific elements behind trusting to look for and work on.
When those elements are in your relationship, you have all the necessary ingredients for trust. When they’re missing, it leaves you grasping at straws regarding trust.
In my video on “How Can I Trust You Again?“, I lay out the trust formula and ways you can start trusting each other again. When you have trust, you have a solid foundation on which you can start growing hope.
Without trust, hope and good intentions have little to build on. Click and download your copy of the trust building video today.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
