One reason travel triggers more concerns is that some spouses remove any constraints when they are away from you. They’re in a different town where they can be anonymous. They can act like someone else when out of town.
The travel factor multiplies the workplace risk of affairs. Whether you like it or not, today’s modern workplace where men and women mingle has risks. That risk start with fantasizing about relationships with co-workers. Although many of your spouses can resist such temptations, some can’t.
The Gottman Institute found that 2 out of 3 women, and 3 out of 4 men admit they have sexual thoughts about co-workers. Think through this risk. It translates to 66% of women and 75% of men having such thoughts. These are numbers you can’t ignore. The odds are that your spouse is having sexual thoughts about a co-worker.
The risk for having sexual thoughts about co-workers is already high. Combine this with being out of town where they can be anonymous with alcohol and being in close proximity and you have a toxic mixture.
If you know about an upcoming business trip consider taking action now.
The following are some guidelines to follow when on a business trip:
- Never have drinks alone with someone of the opposite sex, ESPECIALLY if you’re both married. A good rule is never to drink alcohol at all when in high risk situations. The risk for cheating increases when drinking happens when they are tired.
- Share your feelings about not drinking and why it’s important for you. Have your spouse call you on a daily basis. Staying in touch helps reduce the dangers. If they are not willing to do this, it’s better for you to cancel the trip. One study found 70% of affairs involved alcohol or drugs.
- Make sure you know where your spouse is going and when.
Make it a point of knowing who they are going on the trip with. Communication before the trip helps keep the risk lower for an affair or an affair relapse.
The numbers are NOT in your favor. The odds are stacked against you when it comes to workplace fantasies and affairs.
Although the numbers aren’t in your favor, you’re not out of options. With the material presented in “How Can I Trust You Again?”, you’ll have the tools you need in diminishing the risk. You’ll know what is needed in strengthening the trust in your marriage.
Rather than guessing about what you can do and hoping for the best, you can know for certain whether or not you have a solid foundation of trust in your marriage.
You don’t have to lose your spouse to a co-worker. One quality of trust is that it puts a loving restraint on spouses prone to straying. When they restrain themselves because of trust, it’s the next best thing to you being there.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
