There are songs that I’ve enjoyed no matter who was performing them. When songs have that kind of longevity, there’s something about the message it contains.
One song that’s gone through several variations over the years is “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood” by the Animals. It was later covered by Nina Simone and Santa Esmeralda.
Each performer added their own personal touch to the song. The sentiment of the song about making a plea to not be misunderstood is one I hear among those dealing with affairs.
The problem is that during affair recovery, you will be misunderstood. Both of you will be misunderstood. That’s one of the things about affairs I guarantee will happen.
Your words and your intentions will be misunderstood. Even the positive ones will be misunderstood. Accept this as part of recovery.
It’s only in your own mind where you play out what may happen that you aren’t misunderstood. Let me make this clear…You don’t have the right to be understood. Thinking you do will lead to more conflict.
No matter how many stages of affair recovery you go through, there will be times you’ll be misunderstood. This is something about affair recovery that you just have to accept.
Accepting that you’ll be misunderstood is counter-intuitive to many in modern society. Entering affair recovery with an expectation of being understood by your spouse is one of those ‘unrealistic expectations’ I warn about in my material.
There are many reasons behind being misunderstood. Going through the suffering that goes with being misunderstood is not something you can opt out of. You will go through it whether you stay with your spouse or not.
Being misunderstood brings fights, disappointments and discouragement. When you encounter those things, they will seem daunting. You can either give into those dark experiences or do something about it.
One of the things you can do is order the video “Let’s Talk: Hurting People and Healing Answers”. It guides you in developing some communication techniques and thinking that reduces the amount of misunderstanding.
Although misunderstandings are part of affair recovery, they don’t have to become a habit for the both of you.
Order your copy today.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
