An affair is not an automatic death blow to a marriage. What kills a marriage is not so much the affair, but how the affair and its aftermath are handled by BOTH spouses. There are ways to work through the problems, and there are ways to stop any conversation or discussion. The stopping of conversation is a sure way of strangling the life out of a relationship.
Are you taking steps to improve the communication in your marriage after the affair, or are you strangling the communication? Are you beating the life out of your marriage and not knowing it? When people are in pain, they often inflict pain on others, often to the point of destroying any feelings that once existed in the relationship.
Find out what you can do to avoid the strangling of the relationship or the beating of your spouse senseless (an emotionless). Lifeless spouses are not much fun. The sad part is that you may have been the one that drained the life out of them with an irritating habit that you keep doing over and over.
It is in the aftermath of the affair, that the relationship is saved or killed. It is not the counselor or doctor that kills the marriage relationship, it is the spouses themselves. You can choose to find out what relationship saving techniques you can use to save your marriage or allow the relationship to flounder, gasping for breath and life.
The time to take action is now.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
