Are you one of those who sought out the early signs of an affair? Chances are that by the time you read the warning signs, it was already too late.
By the time you read the list and see evidence, the cheater was already too far gone. Their heart has already turned from you and locked onto their target.
Typically you read the warning sign list and kick yourself for missing things on it. Most of the lists detailing the warning signs of an affair are tardy. They alert you to there being a problem too late.
The one item these lists miss is when the cheater has a sensual focus. When their focus is on their sensual pleasure, it’s only going to be a matter of time before problems show up.
When your spouse has a sensual focus, they view the world in terms of what makes them feel good.
Much like a photographer adjusts the focus prior to taking a picture, making sure that the main object grabs your attention. They use the right lens and light to point your eyes to what they want you to see.
The cheater focuses on sensual items prior to taking steps that gratify themselves. When someone has a sensual focus, they start looking for ways of gaining pleasure.
When they look for affairs and opportunities, they find them. It’s at that point, they start taking action on what they’ve focused on and are drawn to. Most of the affair warning sign checklist alert you to the actions taken in seeking the affair.
Although it’s too late for preventing the affair, those lists can help you prevent affair relapse. The tricky thing about preventing relapse is that many couple stop their prevention interventions before all the changes necessary, including focus are made.
If you’re don’t have a clear relapse prevention plan or even know what to look for, you need the video on ‘Preventing Affair Relapse‘. It guides you in coming up with an affair relapse prevention plan along with letting you know what to look for that indicates danger is near.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
