Archive for December, 2008
If you want to be notified the next time I write something, sign up for email alerts or subscribe to the RSS Feed. Thanks for reading. A recent development in dealing with affairs is the availability of software that allows passwords to hotmail accounts to be hacked. Such accounts are often hacked to find whether [...]
Another strategy often used by stalkers is that of ‘the bandwagon”. This strategy involves when the stalker tries to isolate their victim. During the efforts to isolate them, they often try to make their target believe that they are ‘weird’ for not giving in to the stalker. They will use peer pressure and other techniques [...]
Dealing with stalking behavior is another one of the down sides of affairs. In my previous post I mentioned the ‘hunter’ mentality. Another aspect of the hunter mentality is stalking. If you have ever watched a cat sneaking up on its prey, there are lessons there that will help you understand and deal with stalking [...]
Although humans have advanced in their hunting tools, the techniques used in the hunter-prey relationship have lessons for those struggling with affairs. Some of the old hunting methods consisted of using the pit and the net. A pit was dug for prey to fall into. The pit was often disguised and hidden. If it was [...]
As you consider what your options are in dealing with an affair, it is important to consider whether or not you have the needed tools. Do you have what it takes to make a relationship work? Do you have the patience, love, courage, honesty, and communication skills needed to navigate through the aftermath of an [...]
Unless your spouse is in the medical, law enforcement or international field, the advent of late night calls is concerning. When people call at late hours, it shows a lack of boundaries, and disregard of schedules. Although there are some selfish or ignorant people, in most cases when there are frequent late night calls, there [...]
One question that clients often ask is whether or not I am married and if so, is it to my first wife. In response, I tell the the truth that yes I am married to my first wife of 20+ years. Many counselors often evade the question or probe into the reasons for asking the [...]
I often watch and observe the deer where I live. In watching them, I was reminded of the references in the Bible to deer. The deer is often used to illustrate marriage relationships. When they scatter or run off, the deer then stop and look back. When there is no real danger, they return. They [...]
In recovering from an affair, it is essential to be honest. The honesty also needs to include health related issues. The health issues are important to address. Many couples often take the shortcut and avoid such issues, thinking that it will only stir things up and keep them from living peacefully with each other. Ignoring [...]
Those involved with affairs often compartmentalize their lives. They separate out the affair from the rest of their lives. Such compartmentalizing does not stop when the affair is over. When this habit begins, it is often difficult for those afflicted with it to be honest. The lack of honesty makes it difficult if not impossible [...]
